Describe me!

I know who I am, I think, but that doesn’t particularly help when I’m asked to describe myself; I assume that anyone who’s asking that question wants to know what I look like from the outside.

And I don’t know nuthin’ ’bout that. Can you help me out? I’m worried by the mirror & mould effect: meaning that just as left/right are reversed in a mirror and concave/convex are reversed from the inside of a mould to the outside, I fear I may have an inaccurate or even opposite view of myself as I look from the inside out.

9 Responses to “Describe me!”

  1. Jenny

    (It’s tempting, btw, to say – I’ll answer this if you reciprocate.)

    It is a little difficult to answer, however, because I mostly know you online. And that gives a very distorted perspective.

    But supposing, hypothetically, I said to someone that I was expecting to see you at Three Peaks and they said “who?”, what would I say?

    Presumably – Phil’s a Go player, about the same strength as me, Rich beat him at Barmouth. Fantastic wildlife photographer; I knew him online before I met him properly in person, and he has a nasty habit of saying things that make me inhale drinks because of laughing. And he works with an old school-mate of mine, which is weird.

    Obviously, though, these are practical facts rather than trying to describe your personality. In general I try not to describe people’s personalities unless there’s a very good reason because, well, because it’s difficult and not necessarily useful.

    Give me a good context for *needing* to describe your personality and I’ll tell you how I’d do it in that case. I can’t make a general case work for my mind.

    Does any of that make any sense at all?

  2. Phil Willoughby

    It’s for the old intertron dating doodahs which insist that one describe oneself. Not sure if that counts as “useful”.

    You’re more lucid than you think you are, which is better than the other way around.

    Now where are all my friends who don’t have your very reasonable excuse?!

  3. Jenny

    I’ve never been able to work out what one should say on those things.

    It has just occurred to me – and I do literally mean just, right now this minute – that one needs to work out what sort of thing one wants to read someone else saying, and then work from that to write one’s own. Only, offhand, I’m not sure what that is … Still, it gives me somewhere to start.

    Look at other people’s profiles and say: this is interesting, this is not, this is useful, this tells me nothing … then construct your own equivalent.

  4. Flic

    Well I think it is important to not give too much away because otherwise what are you going to talk about on your first date?

    So here is my attempt:

    Successful, intelligent career man seeks like minded woman. I’m , handsome with medium build and brown hair, educated and looking to meet in for friendship and fun, leading to whatever may come.

  5. Flic

    Hmm, So angle brackets don’t work in comments then

    It should read:-
    Successful, intelligent career man seeks like minded woman. I’m insert age, handsome with medium build and brown hair, educated and looking to meet in insert place for friendship and fun, leading to whatever may come.

    Feel free to just fix my last comment, than add another one :)

  6. Jenny

    Reasonable … I’m minded to say that I would say “intelligent” before “successful” – I don’t suppose you want to come across as someone who values professional success and financial fluidity over intelligence, not least because I’m reasonably certain you aren’t one. Also you seem to have strange spacing after “I’m”. :)

  7. Phil Willoughby


    Both of those are fine ideas. Problem is that I don’t know what I want to read, just that I haven’t seen it yet. My pessimistic side thinks I might be on to a loser because I’m looking for an emotional connection, and I don’t think that’s possible from a one-way communications mechanism.


    That’s interesting, because I’d not have thought I should claim to be handsome. Clearly I have self-esteem issues…

  8. Mark

    Not to be too cynical, but I wouldn’t pin much hope on online dating sites pre-30. The 30+-year-olds seem to be mature enough to not be wasting time. Before then it’s just a crueler version of a beauty pageant.

    Perhaps you should combine this with item #9 on your previous post and find somewhere to learn to dance. And approach it with a clear and open mind, as I find these things never appear when you seek them. Maybe that’s just my dumb luck.

  9. Michael

    You can add “witty” and “funny” if you like.

    I agree with Mark though. Go dancing. That’s a good idea.


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